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Angel20k

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Friends:
DomlyGentlemanMistressGayleHjwl3948Karino4ka

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I am Bi-Curious, but there is no option for that here.
Hi :) My name is Angel. You want to know me? talk to me. :) If you view me, then I will view you. If you are a asshole, or just have dick pics, I won't talk to you. No one wants to see your dick. Please have some respect, for yourself and others.

**I am still finding my way in life. I've lived through more pain abuse and torture than anyone should ever have to deal with. It's not easy, but I'm working on it. If it weren't for some very kind strangers who helped me years ago, I don't think I would even be alive now. So I give thanks for everyday that I live. I never really attached to anyone, mainly because I knew it wouldn't last. I'm a strong person and I am proud that I can say I don't ever have to have someone say "You only have this because of me" No, I have what little I have because of ME. I worked for it :)
? I've seen a lot of people around advertising how smart they are. Book smart. Yes, I can read too.
? I regret nothing. I feel sorry for the abusers, that they will never be able to really love in a way that is wonderful, but know that I have learned a lot and am much more careful now~! ? ? The lifestyle is in my blood and no amount of running over the years has severed that tie. Even through the years of abuse that I suffered at the hands of a so-called Dom and ex boyfriend, it didn't stop me from searching for the one that would be real and calm the chaotic waters of my soul.?I just had to keep going. I love life and love to learn. I spent a majority of my life surviving abuse and neglect. I see it as a learning experience though. If I hadn't gone through what I did, I would never know and appreciate real love and affection. I'm a very easy going person but I am also very careful. Please understand if I'm hesitant in talking.
I also have A.D.D. so concentrating can be difficult sometimes. I hope that you enjoyed reading and please feel free to ask anything. Thank you. ? I love the kink lifestyle and making friends. True friends are always there for you. They are the kind that you can call in the middle of the night if you can't sleep, have a nightmare ? ? ? I love arts and crafts. Those are my main hobbies. I love music. Music is important and I don't think many people really how big a part it can play in life. :)
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? ? ? WARNING: Any institutions using this site or any of its associated sites for studies or projects - You do NOT have my permission to use any of my profile or pictures in any form or forum both current and future. If you have or do, it will be considered a serious violation of my privacy and will be subject to legal ramifications!!


"Your pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding" A great philosopher in my book! My hobbies are reading , writing , rappelling, hiking,skating, drawing , arts and crafts, dressing up/modeling etc. I love poetry, writing it and reading it. But not just any kind, the kind that is dark and gets your mind wondering , that gets inside you and moves your feelings and desires.
******?Keep me rather in this cage, and feed me sparingly, if you dare. Anything that brings me closer to illness and the edge of death makes me more faithful. It is only when you make me suffer that I feel safe and secure. You should never have agreed to be a god for me if you were afraid to assume the duties of a god, and we know that they are not as tender as all that. You have already seen me cry. Now you must learn to relish my tears.?
Pauline R?e

? ?My Daddy Dom is jwl3948. ?

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1/16/2016 10:14:07 PM
I think one great tip is that you should always love yourself. If you don't love yourself, take care of yourself, cater to yourself and that little inner voice, you will really not be very worthy of being with someone else, because you won't be the best version of you.


12/13/2015 1:22:43 PM
Let someone love you just the way you are – as flawed as you might be, as unattractive as you sometimes feel, and as unaccomplished as you think you are. To believe that you must hide all the parts of you that are broken, out of fear that someone else is incapable of loving what is less than perfect, is to believe that sunlight is incapable of entering a broken window and illuminating a dark room

12/13/2015 1:18:20 PM
A collar’s significance goes far beyond ownership. It means that a submissive has found someone who makes them feel safe, loved, and protected. A collar is not a mere accessory, so do not treat it as such.

11/25/2015 8:31:52 AM
A True Dominant

Completes, but never alters
Sees what is there, not what is missing
Receives, but never takes
Has pride, but never arrogance

4/17/2015 8:42:24 AM
W.R. Arden said Murder is unique in that it abolishes the party it injures so that society must take the place of the victim and on his behalf demand atonement or grant forgiveness.

3/11/2015 1:16:34 AM
A Struggle To Surrender

Over a period of time, much of it spent with other submissives and working with those both new and seasoned in the lifestyle, I've been asked this question many times: "What should my goal be as a submissive in a D/s relationship?" Knowing that everyone has a different goal they'd like to achieve, I can only answer this from my own perspective. My answer? Complete surrender.

In the early part of my journey into self-discovery as a submissive, I discovered the answers to many questions I'd had most of my life. In my childhood I had been "a good girl," always seeking to please and needing approval for the things I did. As an adult, I'm not much different and still find pleasure in pleasing those who have earned my respect. Much of this behavior is due to my submissive nature. Finding out that there was a name for what I'd felt all my life gave me an inner peace I'd never known. Discovering there were other people who felt the same things I did gave me a sense of belonging and purpose I'd always longed for. I was eager to learn all I could about submission and the lifestyle that understood and welcomed this part of me.

I was very fortunate to cross paths with a small group of people who had dedicated a portion of their lives to educating novices who, either by choice or accident, had wandered into their world. The time I spent with them was a period of tremendous growth and learning. And when the time came for me to move along in my journey, I left them, armed with my new-found knowledge and the tools I'd need to continue my adventure into this new realm. The next few years were spent in preparation for the One I hoped I'd eventually find at the end of my travels.

Through the kindness of fate, at a time when I least expected Him to enter my life, I met the One. We hit it off immediately and became friends first and foremost. In time, we began to explore the possibility of entering into a relationship based on the D/s lifestyle and found we were compatible and quickly formed the early bonds that take place between submissive and dominant. I was ready. I'd practiced all the things I'd learned, knew all the proper manners and etiquette. I had embraced my submission as closely as anyone could, and I fully expected Him to be satisfied with what I had to offer Him. Well, perhaps with a few minor adjustments and some final polishing.

My submission to Him was easy once I'd learned to trust Him and He'd gained my complete confidence. With His guidance, I submitted my heart, body and will to Him. He was all I'd hoped for; gentle but firm, wise and patient, intelligent and witty. I had reached sub heaven and was still breathing. It was great. All my effort and hard work had paid off and all I had to do now was reap the benefits. WRONG!

Somewhere about this point in our journey together a word had surfaced in our talks. The word was "surrender." I'd heard of this word--after all, I'm a submissive, and I surely knew what surrender meant. My One, now known as my "Master," was pleased with my submission to Him but He had suggested that there was more that He desired from me. When I questioned Him about what it was He wanted, His answer was a simple one. "I want ALL of you." Now I was stunned. What's left that I haven't submitted? He knew every freckle on my skin. He had complete control of my actions and heart. I had made Him master of my soul. What's left? The answer: complete surrender.

That day we began a new journey, one that went deeper into my being than anyone had ever gone. It went to the core of my emotions and my thought processes. It went to the darkest recesses of my mind, the softest parts of my heart, the attic where I'd stored my treasures, the basement where I'd hidden my secrets and the vault where I'd locked away all my hurts and disappointments.

Has this journey been easy? No. By far, it's the most difficult thing either of us have undertaken in our relationship. There have been times when it's been painful, frightening, and has shaken us both. Thankfully, we have a solid foundation of love, trust and respect that we laid long before we started building the walls of our house.

Has it been beneficial? Yes. It has opened the doors to things we'd never dreamed of, taken down walls that kept us apart, and given us both fulfillment and a deeper love, respect and trust than we'd ever had. I've found freedom from things that kept me chained to a past event or gave me fear of the future. Like the layers of an onion, He's helped me to peel away the things I've hidden even from myself.

Has it ended? No, and I suspect that it never will. Reaching complete surrender is not something that will happen quickly for anyone. There have been so many times that I've surrendered something to my Master only to run back and reclaim the gift I'd placed at His feet. He's patient and understands that sometimes I'm just not ready to let go of it yet and He encourages me to try again another day. Although my heart's desire is to lay my very soul out before Him like an open book so that He can read each word I've written there, my mind will not always allow it. There are things that I don't fear Him seeing but I'm not ready to look at them myself. His intent is not to find secrets or treasures that He wishes to use for His own needs, but desires to help me to understand myself more fully so that I may be able to give more of myself to Him. There have been things that He's found written there that His love and compassion have gently erased so that I will never have to view them again. As we turn each page together, we both learn and that helps us grow as a couple.

Submission is a wonderful expression of devotion and service to another human being that you've given dominion over you. You make an active choice to submit, to give in, to let go of your personal power and will. Surrender is the completion of what submission begins. It's giving all of you: body, heart and soul, and not just your will. It's not giving up...it's giving--completely and limitlessly--of all that you are. This is my goal.

-Jade

2/24/2015 8:47:54 AM
Dominants Ask Yourself This Question

"Would you still want to be a Dominant if it meant there was absolutely no sex involved? If you honestly can't separate being a Dominant from the sexual aspects of the lifestyle, then perhaps your reason for wanting to be a Dominant are just a tad superficial.  
  - Michael Makai

2/24/2015 8:44:12 AM
Dom Commandments

1. Do no harm. Don't break your toy, sub, slave, little- you get my drift.

2. Earn her trust.

3. Communicate, Communicate, and Communicate some more.

4. Fly with her when she's in subspace, and hold her tenderly when she crashes into sub drop. Never let her go, until she is ready.

5. Love her

1/30/2015 9:27:00 AM



A Submissive's BlackBoard Lessons

by Torms Tiara
Copyright Torms Tiara, 1997
All Rights Reserved


I will not carve my name on the the flogger handles
I will not spank others without Masters permission
I will not aim for Master's head
I will not yell the Safeword in the grocery store
I will not sell the names of my newsgroup list to the National Enquirer
I will not read and giggle at Master's logs from the Dom Forum
I will not yell fire everytime Master lights a candle
Funny noises are not really funny
I will not slap Master with my bra

Punishment is not boring or pointless
I will not call Master "Dr. Death".
I will not defame the Eulenspeigl Society. I will not put laxatives in the candy bowl before Master's D/s party.
I will not hide the newbies or send them Snipe Dom hunting.
I will not bring sheep to the subbie forum.A burp is not an appropriate response to Master.
I will not eat all Master's M & M's while he is at work
I will not yell she's tied up at the subbie forum
Master's Gags are not to be used to keep the children quiet .
I will not call Master "spud head", "butt head" or any kind of "head".
Masters ARE perfect.
Mud is not an acceptable side dish for dinner for Master.
I will NOT wear panties.
I will not sell snake oil or tiger balm at Master's D/s parties.
Iwill not peek out of the blindfold.
There is no suchthing as "sub immunity".
I will not sneak in the bathroom when I don't have permission.
I did not win an emmy for my last session.
I will not hide all Master's toys.
All play and no work does not a good sub make.
I will not say "Oh, Master you're the bestest and biggest" just to get a spanking.
I can not fire Master. !!!
My last assignment was not stolen by one armed net hackers
I will not scare the newbies by telling them ALL REAL subs like bullwhips.
I will refrain from saying "Hail Satan" when I don't like Master's orders
I will not remind Master daily of our 1 day, 1 week, 1 month, 1 yr.  anniversary
I will not waste wax!! by playing with it or putting it on all Master's clamps
I will not use Master's bondage table for a skateboard ramp or a slide into  the pool
I will not wear Master's underwear on my head !!
Master's dog does not stink !
I will not torment the newbies with the Violet Wand !
I will not use the pages from Master's Dom Handbook to start the grill
I will not giggle uncontrollably when the cat decides to "help" Master.

Nor will I remind him that he is Sub for the Cat.
I will ATTEMPT not to laugh when the son remarks that he heard "slapping" noises and got up to see where they were coming from.
I will faithfully remember that washing Masters shorts with my red sweatshirt  is not a good thing to do.
I will try to remember that Masters are allowed to snore.
I will not cut and paste my Master's IMs to the chat room
"All the other Dom's let their subs do it" is not a valid reason
I will not giggle when my Master is lecturing me
I will not get my subbie friends into trouble, as they are capable of doing  that on their own.
I will not refer to my Master as "Cute", when he is angry

1/30/2015 9:20:52 AM

Realistic Cybersex

Wellhung: Hello, Sweetheart. What do you look like?

Sweetheart: I am wearing a red silk blouse, a miniskirt and high heels. I work out every day, I'm toned and perfect. My measurements are 36-24-36. What do you look like?

Wellhung: I'm 6'3" and about 250 pounds.I wear glasses and I have on a pair of blue sweat pants I just bought from Walmart.I'm also wearing a T-shirt with a few spots of barbecue sauce on it from dinner. ..it smells funny.

Sweetheart: I want you.Would you like to screw me?

Wellhung: OK

Sweetheart: We're in my bedroom.There's soft music playing on the stereo and candles on my dresser and night table.I'm looking up into your eyes, smiling. My hand works its way down to your crotch and begins to fondle your huge, swelling bulge.

Wellhung: I'm gulping, I'm beginning to sweat.

Sweetheart: I'm pulling up your shirt and kissing your chest.

Wellhung: Now I'm unbuttoning your blouse.My hands are trembling.

Sweetheart: I'm moaning softly.

Wellhung: I'm taking hold of your blouse and sliding it off slowly.

Sweetheart: I'm throwing my head back in pleasure.The cool silk slides off my warm skin.I'm rubbing your bulge faster, pulling and rubbing.

Wellhung: My hand suddenly jerks spastically and accidentally rips a hole in your blouse.I'm sorry.

Sweetheart: That's OK, it wasn't really too expensive.

Wellhung: I'll pay for it.

Sweetheart: Don't worry about it.I'm wearing a lacy black bra. My soft breasts are rising and falling, as I breath harder and harder.

Wellhung: I'm fumbling with the clasp on your bra.I think it's stuck. Do you have any scissors?

Sweetheart: I take your hand and kiss it softly.I'm reaching back undoing the clasp. The bra slides off my body. The air caresses my breasts. My nipples are erect for you.

Wellhung: How did you do that? I'm picking up the bra and inspecting the clasp.

Sweetheart: I'm arching my back. Oh baby. I just want to feel your tongue all over me.

Wellhung: I'm dropping the bra. Now I'm licking your, you know, breasts. They're neat!

Sweetheart: I'm running my fingers through your hair. Now I'm nibbling your ear.

Wellhung: I suddenly sneeze. Your breasts are covered with spit and phlegm.

Sweetheart: What?

Wellhung: I'm so sorry. Really.

Sweetheart: I'm wiping your phlegm off my breasts with the remains of my blouse.

Wellhung: I'm taking the sopping wet blouse from you. I drop it with a plop.

Sweetheart: OK. I'm pulling your sweat pants down and rubbing your hard tool.

Wellhung: I'm screaming like a woman. Your hands are cold! Yeeee!

Sweetheart: I'm pulling up my miniskirt. Take off my panties.

Wellhung: I'm pulling off your panties. My tongue is going all over, in and out nibbling on you...umm... wait a minute.

Sweetheart: What's the matter?

Wellhung: I've got a pubic hair caught in my throat. I'm choking.

Sweetheart: Are you OK? Wellhung: I'm having a coughing fit. I'm turning all red.

Sweetheart: Can I help?

Wellhung: I'm running to the kitchen, choking wildly. I'm fumbling through the cabinets, looking for a cup. Where do you keep your cups?

Sweetheart: In the cabinet to the right of the sink.

Wellhung: I'm drinking a cup of water. There, that's better.

Sweetheart: Come back to me, lover.

Wellhung: I'm washing the cup now.

Sweetheart: I'm on the bed arching for you.

Wellhung: I'm drying the cup. Now I'm putting it back in the cabinet. And now I'm walking back to the bedroom. Wait, it's dark, I'm lost. Where's the bedroom?

Sweetheart: Last door on the left at the end of the hall.

Wellhung: I found it.

Sweetheart: I'm tuggin' off your pants. I'm moaning. I want you so badly.

Wellhung: Me too.

Sweetheart: Your pants are off. I kiss you passionately-our naked bodies pressing each other.

Wellhung: Your face is pushing my glasses into my face. It hurts.

Sweetheart Why don't you take off your glasses?

Wellhung: OK, but I can't see very well without them. I place the glasses on the night table.

Sweetheart: I'm bending over the bed. Give it to me, baby!

Wellhung: I have to pee. I'm fumbling my way blindly across the room and toward the bathroom.

Sweetheart: Hurry back, lover.

Wellhung: I find the bathroom and it's dark. I'm feeling around for the toilet. I lift the lid.

Sweetheart: I'm waiting eagerly for your return.

Wellhung: I'm done going. I'm feeling around for the flush handle, but I can't find it. Uh-oh!

Sweetheart: What's the matter now?

Wellhung: I've realized that I've peed into your laundry hamper. Sorry again. I'm walking back to the bedroom now, blindly feeling my way.

Sweetheart: Mmm, yes. Come on.

Wellhung: I'm touching your smooth butt. It feels so nice. I kiss your neck. Umm, I'm having a little trouble here.

Sweetheart: I'm moving my ass back and forth, moaning. I can't stand it another second! Slide in! Screw me now!

Wellhung: I'm flaccid.

Sweetheart: What?

Wellhung: I'm limp. I can't sustain an erection.

Sweetheart: I'm standing up and turning around; an incredulous look on my face.

Wellhung: I'm shrugging with a sad look on my face, my weiner all floppy. I'm going to get my glasses and see what's wrong.

Sweetheart: No, never mind. I'm getting dressed. I'm putting on my underwear. Now I'm putting on my wet nasty blouse.

Wellhung: No wait! Now I'm squinting, trying to find the night table. I'm feeling along the dresser, knocking over cans of hair spray, picture frames and your candles.

Sweetheart: I'm buttoning my blouse. Now I'm putting on my shoes.

Wellhung: I've found my glasses. I'm putting them on. My God! One of our candles fell on the curtain. The curtain is on fire! I'm pointing at it, a shocked look on my face.

Sweetheart: Go to hell. I'm logging off, you loser!

Wellhung: Now the carpet is on fire! Oh noooo!

Sweetheart: <{logged off}>


1/21/2015 10:34:22 AM
Let me put to rest what is legal in NY since I used to be a professional dominant. 1- No insertions 2- Yes, you can be tied up and beaten 3- Yes a Dominant can go topless due to the fact that it is legal for women to walk the streets topless in NYC. 4- Never do sessions in Westchester bdsm is illegal. So, basically I have to go 2 blocks away from my house for it to be legal. 5- In NY you can consent to be beaten in Massachusetts you can't consent to be beaten. Your body belongs to the state and not to you. Also, the law applies only if you get caught. 6- Cops in NY don't like filling out reports on bdsm activities since they are usually not prosecuted by any ADA. 7- You can't do Red, Yellow, Brown or Roman Showers all go against STATE health codes. They might also go against COUNTY health codes or even City or Town Health Codes since all can spread disease in some way shape or form. That is why restaurant workers and medical personnel have to wash their hands before leaving the bathroom. 8- There are nude cleaning services in NY. So a submissive being naked isn't a big deal. Also, in NY you have many, many art schools that you draw from naked bodies and both are legal. LAST AND FOREMOST you are tributing a professional dominant for her time not her skills that arouse you. So, then If you were paying her for her skills that would be prostitution. The law can be perception also. BDSM in NY is called 'being in the gray area of the law'. Also, if a guy messaged me wanting a pro session, I would consider the male as if I was considering a boyfriend at this point. If there was no chemistry I wouldn't do the session. Some dominants do think like that when they are actively a professional dominant. When you work in a dungeon, you have to take whatever client is assigned to you. When I went solo, I only dealt with single men or males that I spoke to their wives. Not all pro doms are clean of drugs or disease free due to the fact that the state doesn't regulate this industry. I knew whole dungeons in NYC when I was in college and working to pay my tuition, places that wouldn't hire me based on the fact I wouldn't do drugs. So, use your head and realize fantasy vs reality. In an uncontrolled vocation that is in the gray area of the law you have to use your intelligence when picking out a professional dominant. It is not the looks that makes the dominant it is the attitude once you get inside the place that you are playing. There is no test to figure out if a dominant is good or bad.SO DON"T PLAY GAMES. You will probably not find the right dominant to visit or to have you visit due to the fact that people do not like their time wasted.

I know that your post is educational in nature, and an attempt to keep people informed, but there things in your post that are misinformed/legally inaccurate. I think the ultimate lessons that you try to impart are very good. Namely, that perception plays an important part of the law, and that acts/intentions can be construed in multiple different ways, therefore, you cannot insulate yourself entirely from prosecution.

Dealing with just the most important misconception consent is not, I repeat, not a defense to assault in the context of sadomasochism New York State. See People v. Jovanovic, 263 A.D.2d 182, 206, 700 N.Y.S.2d 156, 174 (1st Dep't 1999) (Mazarelli, J., concurring in part) ("As the majority correctly notes, neither statutory section (regarding assault provides for a consent defense, nor do these sections list lack of consent as an element to be proven by the prosecution.") For a defense for a criminal prosecution to exist it must either be part of the common law or codified explicitly in the statute. The assault statute does not contain a consent defense, nor has one been accepted at common law when dealing with sexual or sadomasochistic activities. The context in which consent has been accepted as a defense to assault is extremely limited, and sadmasochism as, at least in dicta, been excluded as the type of potential assault to which one can consent.


11/20/2014 8:50:50 AM
See Profile SocialEnigma!

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MsUltraViolet
 
 Age: 27
 Gainsville, Florida