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LessVanilla
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MasterSotter
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play46
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| If you are looking for a friend, please stop by and say hello.
Thank you
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Thanksgiving Eve....oh boy. Spending another holiday trying to be thankful, alone. It's just another day right? |
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Do you know what it is like to miss someone? To crave their laughter and smile? To feel their pressence around you? To value who they are?
There was a time in my life when I never thought about stress, pain, longing, comfort, stability, lacking sleep, getting tired, focusing or all the traits I need to be whole. This is not that time.
As I approach 50 this year, reality knocks loudly in my head. So much so, that sleep won't come. I have always been most hard on myself when I err. If others yell at me, or give me "that look", or won't talk to me, or won't embrace me, or can't forgive me, or don't understand me, or disappear from my life, just imagine how a perfectionist off of her game feels every minute of each day.
The sadness and tears are just laying under the surface of all I do. The overwhelming pursuit of self-confidence and esteem goes so deep that you don't believe anything positive you hear about your self or life.
Luckily, in this lifestyle, I have become open and honest about everything that I feel. If not, I would not be able to talk to my doctor about these issues and get the medical help I need to walk through life as a confident, good person. Thank God he is in my life so I may speak with him - my friend. Thank my parents for making me an independant woman who is not afraid to reach out to others when they need something that person offers.
So I ask again, do you know what it is like to miss someone? To crave their laughter and smile? To feel their pressence around you? To value who they are? What if it's you that you can't find?
This week, I received a job offer when being unemployed has devastated my world. I spoke with my doctor to receive the help I need at night time. He said, "so I just have to really knock you out at night to ensure you receive sleep?" {I fell asleep this morning at 6:10 a.m. and woke at 10:00}. I pick up my today!
The most important thing about this week is that I reached out to a Dom who believes in making his property better. He shows me the positive in all things, praises me for the little things I can accomplish in my situation, talks to me and makes me feel important. He doesn't have to be told I need him and his contact, allows me to express every thought I have, even if it doesn't follow his belief. , He listens to me when I feel noone else will or that no one will understand what I think, and he makes time to lift me up, just when I feel down.
As a submissive or slave, do you know what it feels like to truly get what you know you need from the one you call Master or Sir? I do. |
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I have noticed recently, that a true Dom will find the positive in all the disappointment. A Master will guide you to seeing the positive and find a way to make you see it for yourself.
Thank you Master James..... |
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A little glance into the heart and soul of a submissive....
One of us reaches out. The other engages in conversation. Based on the characteristics of the others' profile, we either engage very little, a little, a lot or go into stalking mode. Your profile is what captures our interest. I am sure it's the same with you.
Since we never share everything about our true selves on the profile, we work toward learning what wasn't listed. The basics are important. Are you married? Are you involved with someone? Are you employed? Are you a Dom, sub or Switch? Are you looking for LTR or something a little more fun and for the moment of passion? What's brought you to the lifestyle? How long have you been in the lifestyle? What or who are you looking for? What do you expect of me, if I were to become involved with you? Where do you live and what work do you do?
Sure, that is mostly vanilla information, but for a relationship to work on any level, those questions always need to be answered honestly. If you are honest with me, I can decide if what you have to offer, works for me and the same for you.
After we learn if these traits, skills, experiences, nuances (if you will), we both have a decision to make. Will we be friends? Is there chemistry? Do we hunger and crave what the other has described about themselves? Do we see ourselves, if all proves to be the truth, dominating or submitting to the other? And if so, long term or short term?
You may recognize all of this from the vanilla life. The basics are the same, regardless of what life you pursue. These relationships within the lifestyle, work because of the blunt honesty and lack of game playing with the other party. If you want a hook-up, say so. I am not into that, but there are plenty of people who come on this site that are just trying to escape the bills they have, the broken heart someone just gave them, the kids, the divorcees who need unbridled passion. Just say that is what you want and you will, I am sure, find someone who wants that also.
To claim you are a Dominant, and turn out to be a submissive, just wastes time. You could have sought out a Domme of your own and submitted to her every desire, while fulfilling your needs in return.
To claim that your marriage is no longer necessary or important to you or your wife/husband, and then they find out what you're doing and all hell breaks loose (bringing an innocent sub into the middle of your failed relationship) does cause harm--all around.
To say that your video doesn't work, but you want to see your new sub in many promiscuous poses and poses, just shows that you are a pervert who needs to see a girl or guy get off, so you can orgasm.
To post a gorgeous picture, calling that you, and ending up looking ordinary and normal-not male model-like, is wrong on all levels. The other person thinks about you, fantasizes about you, dreams of your touch and passion, but she/he is thinking of someone else--not you. What have you really gained by the deception? You have actually caused what you were trying to avoid; someone not falling for you because of your looks. Who's the vain one in that?
During the two years that I explored who I really am, submissive through and through, I researched this lifestyle and how I could fit within it. Finally knowing that my true nature; my pure nature, is to serve a dominant man--in every way, brought me to leaving my husband after 20 years in a non-passionate, deeply devoted subservient behavior and embarking on the journey of divorce from my very best friend.
What was more important to me as a woman and a sub, was that I serve a man who knows the meaning of the gift I have to offer, while he molds, teaches, instructs and guides me to please him in every way he desires. This man would envelope me into in his life and be my world. Otherwise, I would have stayed with my best friend, who is a wonderful vanilla man.
There were several others that I've chatted with over this past year. I am actually chatting with another now, but I don't have any expectations or high hopes that this will work as I expect either. I hope he can prove me wrong and show me all that is beautiful in this lifestyle because I am depressed, my self esteem has been crushed over and over and I am still wanting to serve a man who knows what it is to receive all that I can offer.
Happy Holidays my friends. Be safe and honest in your journey to utopia!
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It's time to hang this up and go back to vanilla. Honesty is not my friend in this lifestyle. |
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