the position i seek is one that resonates from my core. there is no trauma or event or circumstance in my life that has awakened or spawned this desire. it is part of me as my essence and has alwsys been there. it is inate, it resides at my core as one of the purest natural parts of who i am. i have known this from a young age and it has been driving me my entire life. always there, always prodding and gnawing at me. demanding satisfaction.

when i find the postion i need, this essence will be sated and i will be whole. to accomplish this i will do as needed with that very core driving me, to do well and please my master in all things. nothing else will take precedence or be thought of. this is my destiny and my need. it is what has to be for me to be whole.