| ****I am a plus size submissive. If you have issues with size then leave my profile and do not contact me!
***If you are a submissive or switch male looking for someone to spank, whip, top or just occasionally switch with you, I am NOT the person!!! Please just move on and do not send me any messages trying to convince me how I should give it a shot with you. Just quietly move along, thank you. ***
***If you are looking for online only please do not message me. I'm looking for real time, local that includes spending time together once a week or every other week depending on our schedules. Even when we are not together my Dom will still be in control and we will have communication through daily texts and phone calls.
***One last thing...ages. I'm looking to submit to a Dom, no train someone to be a Dom. So if you're in your 20s I'm not interested. I am looking for a Sir/Master/Daddy...not a Grandpa! If you're 60+ I'm not interested, sorry. My age range is 32-58...and I think that is not only reasonable but open minded and a very large and generous range. If you don't fit it, please don't take it personally, it's just not going to work.
Regardless if you fit in my requirements or not, I wish you all the best on your journey and hope we all find what we're looking for. May you all have safe journeys on soft paths. Much love!
Who am i?
i am BOLD and In-Your-Face
i am raw and vulnerable
i am a scared little child
i am a smart business woman
i am sweet and innocent
i am sadistic and guilty
i am a confidant, lover and friend
i am withdrawn
i am restless
i am quiet and content
i am loud and obnoxious
i am meek and insecure
i am powerful and confident
i am wanting to please
i am faithful and loving
i am worthy
i am a believer
i am a cynic
i am a philosopher
i am a hard worker
i am independent
i am needy
i am heart broken
i am blessed with love
i am flawed
i am a perfectionist
i am a slob
i am carefree
i am structured
i am valuable
i am beautiful
i am plain and simple
i am boring
i am intense
i am jaded
i am hopeful for something better and something more
i am wild and untamed
i am ready to be tamed but not without a fight...
i am a world of contradictions
i AM ME!!!
You wanna know something more, ASK!
i will NOT submit to just anyone. i will scene with just about anyone but my submission is not something i will give away lightly.
a Master/Dom who i admire and respect enough to want to get to know better
who i can trust on all levels (mental, physical, emotional, spiritual, etc...)
who can teach me patience without making me resentful
who enjoys my wit and personality, and wants to not change it but improve it by making me a better submissive.
someone i know who will not put me in harm’s way
who will be truly responsible and accountable of me and my submission
who can correct me without raising His voice
who demands respect with just a whisper or look
someone who lives their life with great honor always doing the right thing
who has Mastered Himself first
who has self-control
whose life is in order first
Why will i submit?
i am 46, live in Connecticut just outside of the Hartford area, stable, sane (as much as anyone can claim to be), intelligent, honest and loyal to a fault, and have a great sense of humor where I can as easily laugh at myself (which I tend to do often cause i have a bad habit of putting my foot in my mouth and/or being a ditz from time to time…lol) as well as laugh with others.
i discovered the lifestyle about 20+ years ago, when i was married to my ex-husband who was a Marine, but didn't know what it was then, just thought of it as kinky sex back then. We played around with light bondage and a few other things in the bedroom to spice our life up...we were like rabbits and always willing to explore. It was a fun time in my life, unfortunately that didn’t spill over to the rest of the marriage and soon like all good things, it came to an end. Upon moving back to CT i lived with a relative so my exploring had to be temporarily put on hold as well. Once i was on my own and had my own computer, since there is only so much you can do on a library computer without being kicked out...lol, i began to research the lifestyle more, and a name was then put to what i was craving. At first i was a bit embarrassed and would only look so far, thinking i could never allow myself to do anything like this…Here i am finally, about 15 or 16 years later since my experiences with my hubby and light bondage that began the desire…and 10 years since i actively began researching it…and had that desire grow in to a serious undeniable craving…i have found my way in to the local bdsm community and have made many friends, learned a lot more than I have ever dreamed I would about the lifestyle and about myself. Now i am just hoping that the circle can be completed by finding the right Master/Dom to submit to…
What I am looking for:
Maturity - I've found that i need someone who is more mature than me, that doesn’t mean He has to be older than me. But someone who is grounded and can pull on the reins when i tend to fly off, in order to keep me grounded and give me a reality check on occasion. Also, allow me to be a kid and have fun when i need to be, which can be bratty from time to time, and be able to provide the safe boundaries and guidelines i need to help me develop as a person. He must be able to listen to me vent when i need it without getting emotional Himself and be able to provide the feedback, and overall advice that is balanced and sound. One who believes that what is best for me may not always be self serving for Him and can help me see that what is best for me may not always please me or satisfy my needs either, but is what i need at that moment, and will never harm me.
Emotional Stability/Sanity – i need a Master/Dom who can remain level headed always, even and especially when i am not…One who can discuss things with me without allowing His emotions to cause bias and be open to what i am saying and or feeling at the time, to use that same level headedness when choosing the proper punishment and/or reward too. This sanity is also crucial if i am to ever allow anyone in to my mind, to know i will never be harmed mentally or physically…Also, i do not wish to find out down the road that my new Master/Dom is a psycho and/or a stalker, which is why i must get to know You well BEFORE submitting to You, until my fears have been eased. Do not expect me to meet You and take Your collar or offer my submission on the first meet, it just ain’t happening folks…
Honesty – i will be completely honest with my Master/Dom and expect it in return. i am too old for head games of any sort in any aspect of my life. Keep things real and honest above all else.
Patience – Keep in mind, i am still very new to this lifestyle and never had a D/s relationship before so i am still learning…it may take some time for me, so much patience will be needed. i am my toughest critic and may become very impatient with myself, patience is not my virtue so it must be His…~smiles~
Safety and Protection - All subs want to feel safe and secure; i am no different. i have had a bad experience with a “Dom” in the beginning of my journey and learned a lot from it, especially that i have the right to demand all safety measures be in place and that it is understood i have the permission to end a scene if at any time i feel in danger, so know that i may invoke that at any time…i would expect that the Master/Dom i do submit to would keep my safe always, whether in a scene or not and save me from myself if need be as well.
Intelligence - Yes i am a college educated submissive (with a Bachelors in Marketing and an Associates as well, and will probably go back for a Masters in due time) who has a brain of her own, and sometimes even uses it. ~giggles softly~ So, i would like for my Master/Dom to be intelligent and able to carry on an intelligent conversation, be interesting and be interested in what i find to be interesting as well…even if He has to fake it every now and then, and i will do the same in return. hehe
Communication - As those that practice sane BDSM know, this is the most important part of a successful relationship. Submission is a voluntary act, and i must feel comfortable bringing up concerns that i have. Communication is even more important in this lifestyle than it ever was in the vanilla relationships because my life will be in my Master/Dom’s hands for real…He must know how to read me, bodywise and that in which i am feeling but NOT saying because i do not wish to disappoint, the typical sub attitude that many have…i will try not to be like that often and be honest about my feelings, etc but sometimes during a scene i may fall prisoner to this and need my Master/Dom to know when this is happening and the proper manner to handle it, which may include ending the scene.
Consistency - i expect the Master/Dom i submit to will be consistent in all ways, punishments, rules, rewards, giving advice, etc…as much as i may wish for the rewards to get greater, i will not ask for Him to change them because then i would suspect the punishments would have to increase too and well, ummm no, thank you Sir…~grins coyly~…and to always have a level head in choosing punishment, etc…
Discipline and Structure - Yes, rules and structure are needed in order for me to be able to succeed in providing what my Master/Dom requires. i do not wish to be set up for failure, although i have no doubt i will try to be bratty and get out of punishments from time to time ~eg~ and sometimes i may feel a rule is too unfair or think that the punishment is too harsh for the crime and hope that you will hear me out…and be willing to discuss things when needed. i expect You to be fair above all else, and i will accept whatever the final decision is for the punishment or reward…
Training - All Masters/Doms have different preferences. i will need to be trained by my Master/Dom to ensure that i fulfill all of His needs and desires. He should not expect me to be already trained and easily upset if i do not know something already.
Fun – Above all else…let’s have FUN! We come to this lifestyle to get away from the pressures and stressors of the vanilla world so let’s keep it drama free as much as possible and have fun. If the fun is gone then it all becomes just a chore and neither of us will want to be in the relationship at that point!!!!
Sex - Yes, sex is important but not as important as the rest. i have been many years without that this is the least of my concerns, i know i will survive without this aspect ever coming to fruition but i must admit i don’t wish for that to happen. i love sex, need lots of it and am damn good at it!!! (albeit a bit out of practice though…haha) i would love to fulfill all or most of my Master/Dom’s sexual desires, within reason and safety concerns of course. All sex must be safe sex and practiced with condoms and partners must be drug and disease free. i have had all tests done and am free of all sexually transmitted diseases, so i expect the same…
What i have to offer:
Obedience and Loyalty – It is complete obedience and absolute beauty that are a slave’s duties…Granted, i am not a slave and do not profess to be one at this time but will never say never…i may not be able to offer the absolute beauty but will attempt to always look beautiful in the eyes of my Master/Dom, both on the inside and outside. i will obey all that my Master/Dom asks of me as long as i never feel unsafe or am put in a situation to be harmed or harm others or do anything illegal. i am loyal to a fault as i mentioned earlier and will defend everyone i care about, whether it be my Master/Dom, friend or other who is being wronged, so step accordingly…cause i CAN and WILL get ghetto if needed…~weg~
Honesty – i am a very honest person and probably too honest, telling people things i probably should not about myself. If i am asked a direct question i will answer honestly, but i will not divulge just any information that can be misconstrued or put anyone in a bad light, we are all entitled to live this lifestyle in however we see fit and have fun in a drama free environment…i choose carefully who i share things with knowing that there is a bad habit of gossiping in this lifestyle, i do everything within my power to remain out of that…if i ever offend anyone, i apologize now, because that is never my intent…
Communication – i will openly communicate my fears, dreams, uncertainties, desires, insecurities with my Master/Dom. i need for Him to listen openly and intently and provide feedback. i will try to always be clear and concise and never ambiguous so to prevent any miscommunication.
Intelligence – Yes i am a college educated submissive (with a Bachelors in Marketing and an Associates as well, and will probably go back for a Masters in Public Health or Business Administration in due time) who has a brain of her own, and sometimes even uses it. ~giggles softly~ i expect to be treated as an intelligent human being and not a dumb submissive…
Fun/Sense of Humor/Positive Attitude – Above all else…let’s have FUN! We come to this lifestyle to get away from the pressures and stressors of the vanilla world so let’s keep it drama free as much as possible and have fun. i have a pretty good sense of humor and can be found laughing at myself or seeing the humor and positive side to any given situation, no matter how dire it may look.
Sex – Yes, sex is important but not as important as the rest. i have been many years without that this is the least of my concerns, i know i will survive without this aspect ever coming to fruition but i must admit i don’t wish for that to happen. i love sex, need lots of it and am damn good at it!!! (albeit a bit out of practice though…haha) i would love to fulfill all or most of my Master/Dom’s sexual desires, within reason and safety concerns of course. All sex must be safe sex and practiced with condoms and partners must be drug and disease free. i have had all tests done and am free of all sexually transmitted diseases, so i expect the same…
Thank you for taking the time to read this in its entirety. ~smiles~
Please note i am in no rush to fill this vacancy in my life...i will wait for the right Master/Dom and know it will take time to be sure, so if you are in a rush to find a sub and fill that vacancy quickly in your life, and will become impatient waiting, then i am not the right one for you!!!