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Due to the nature of 'online dating' (the writing of a profile of varying lengths which may or
Female Switch, 39,  Phoenix, Arizona US

Link to this profile:











 Female Switch



 5' 2"





Actively Seeking:

Dominant Male

Switch Men

Due to the nature of "online dating" (the writing of a profile of varying lengths which may or may not hold pertinent information) coupled with the "instant gratification" desires of many people (who frequently fail to give even a cursory skim over profiles consisting of more than ten words) resulting in occasional increases in frustration levels (from repeatedly receiving emails requesting information which is already shared in the profile) ... a few important notes (with all sorts of fun colors and formatting to help make things stand out nicely):

  • I am not a Unicorn.

  • I have NO desire to PENETRATE a man (with a strap-on or otherwise).

  • I'm really not "lifestyle" oriented, feel free to ask for clarification if you're not sure what that means.  (No-- let's save time: it means I'm not horribly serious about "the lifestyle", other things frequently take a higher priority.  It's called Reality, you should try it sometime.)

  • I am NOT interested in:  NSA, anonymous, one night stand type relationships.

  • I am highly unlikely to be interested in anyone over 15 years my senior.

  • I am not interested in long distance relationships.

  • If all of this is "too much" for you to have to read, we aren't a good match, feel free to move along. :)

If you're looking for your "magical, special unicorn" or someone who's willing to fuck your ass until you're crying, you need to be looking at a different profile.


Auburn hair with a touch of grey and hazel-green eyes.  Bbw, totally comfy in my own skin, it's not a problem for me, if it is for you feel free to move right along without comment. :)


 As regards to "not knowing what you look like" because I don't have a picture posted: no, I will not post any pictures.  I have my reasons and I don't "give in to" external pressure to do things.  If I chat with someone for a bit and feel comfortable sharing privately, then I will do so.  However!  Attempting to pressure me into sharing my picture (or my real name) before I'm damn well good and ready to, or telling me I'm "not a real [sub, slave, whatever]", isn't going to convince me to do so.  It's manipulative, disrespectful and a sign of how you'll behave in a relationship - and I don't need or want that kind of drama in my life.  My profile has always provided a general idea of what I look like, if that's "not good enough" for you it's no skin off my nose.

"About" me?  Sadomasochistic switch, usually more dominant than submissive but I do enjoy both sides.  Various interests, sexually and kink-wise, but I prefer to share those in private conversation rather than cater to the online trolls spankbanks.  Really I'm just "greedy" when it comes to my sexuality, I don't like to share it with all and sundry.  I did add some of my 'general interests' on the checklists as some people seemed to REALLY want there to be info there, however I did not add any of my sexual or "lifestyle" interests save a few of my "not into's".

Significantly more important "stuff" about me than the above:

  • Love daisies, not so fond of roses.

  • Love all sorts of music, so long as it's playing (not so much country!).

  • Really love old movies!

  • Adore having rather random conversations (frequent topics that make me smile or giggle include: the impending zombie apocalypse of doom; my cat; who's your favorite Muppet?; button, button who's got the button; Shōwa era Godzilla; and a variety of others).

  • SapiosexualNo, that's not a buzzword for "please be a semi-coherent adult capable of SOME form of multi-syllabic communication." I have a high IQ and I'm primarily attracted to intelligence, everything else is secondary, tertiary, or entirely unimportant to me. Yes, really.

  • Can be completely content to sit in the same room with someone reading entirely different things in virtual silence. However, in the "getting to know you" process I prefer lots of thought-sharing and feedback -- unexplained, lengthy silences will result in loss of interest / emotional disconnect.

  • Adore assorted other activities, both at home and "in town", but as an INTJ (emphasis on the I there) I tend to be a home-body. :)

Lots more dimensions to me than that, of course, but it's easier to answer questions than try to figure out what might be important to people I haven't yet met.

PAY CLOSE ATTENTION TO THE NEXT PARAGRAPH!  (Was that noticeable enough?)

What am I looking for?  I've run the gamut, done the casual thing, done the friends with bennies, had vanilla and non-vanilla LTRs.  I am NOT interested in NSA, anonymous, one night stand type stuff anymore.  I'd really love to meet someone worthwhile, develop some friendship while enjoying some naughty fun (we're all adults here, there's no reason to pretend), and see if we connect enough to keep it going for a good long while.  Ultimately I would prefer a "real" relationship (i.e: aspects of bdsm and vanilla in a functional, healthy, happy companionship that works).  Submissive leaning switches generally preferred but I'm very open to chatting with all sorts of people.  Intelligence, sense of humor and ability to communicate are necessities.  Most things beyond that are negotiable.  ;)

There's the proverbial nutshell for ya.

One last thing: If I don't respond to an email immediately, it's either because I only have time to be on for a moment or because I'm considering what I read and pondering how I want to respond. (I generally always respond, even if it's just to tell someone that I'm not interested [or to go shove something pointy, sharp and a bit rusty up their own arse].)

Patience isn't just a virtue, it prevents ya from looking like a tool.  ;)


Journal Entries:
12/6/2016 10:01:53 AM
Apparently I'm a "lieing fake cunt" because my profile neither indicates that I like "human ashtray" play nor that I'm a whore who'll accept monetary compensation to do what someone wants, yet I dare to say "Um, no thanks, not interested" when asked to travel to another state and use someone as an ashtray for $500... Seems my consistency thwarts flawed logic, yet again. Damn me and my evil cunt, damn me straight to hell (*trying not to piss from laughing too hard!*)

11/29/2016 6:30:12 PM
Ladies and Gentlemen (particularly the latter)... for love of all fuck: PLEASE take the three seconds necessary to save your photos in the correct, upright position so that people do not have to tilt their head sideways OR steal your photo and correct it themselves in order to look at what you've freely shared. Specifically the more vanilla of your images -- because unless the laws of physics don't apply to you, we're fairly positive your car is not doing a bumper-stand while you mysteriously float in front of it on your invisible lounge in your invisible pool, fully dressed. Seriously, I've discussed it with a number of female friends recently and the overall consensus is that if you can't be bothered to do that, they aren't going to bother reading your profiles. (Well, unless it's just another dick pick, in which case it really doesn't matter what direction it's pointing in since we don't believe that it's really *yours* unless we view it quite literally first hand at some point as we very much feel like "seen one, seen 'em all.") This has been another helpful PSA, we now return you to your regularly scheduled perving.

[Edited to add: I'm not a message board reader but it's been brought to my attention that this is a frequent topic there and there's some sort of site issue causing this problem, so I'll let the ladies know at the next coffee. Be that as it may, however, that doesn't detract from the surprisingly vehement points they were making about things which cause them to skip profiles. It's certainly something to be aware of when making one eh? ;) )

3/17/2016 7:51:37 PM
Apparently sometime today it became known that billionaire Elon Musk and his actress wife Talulah Riley are ending their marriage, for a second time. One mans responses to this:

"If the guy who figured out the electric car, and developed a space transportation program to reduce space-travel costs and to enable the colonization of Mars, a very bright guy from all accounts, can't figure out marriage, do any of us have even a modicum of hope in finding marital happiness?"


3/2/2012 7:07:29 AM


It's amusing to me how "true masters" feel a need to assert their "superiority" by attempting to be belittling and smug when given clear reasons for why we aren't compatible.  Simply proves that, as is so often the case, my assessment of their behavior to that point was correct.  It's funny how predictable they can be, a simple "not interested" is never sufficient -- it's taken as a challenge, the thought process seems to be "she simply doesn't know what she needs, I'll convince her she needs me" ... so instead, clear reasons are given, the result: those "true masters" get all huffy and whiny.  What asshats.  Sadly their numbers seem to be growing...  I think this year I'll just stop being polite and responding to emails from those clowns.


Addendum: it's also amusing to me how many of them will get nasty and argumentative and then, when faced with sound reasoning which they really can't 'win' against, they up their attitude a little further, send "one last message" and immediately block so it can't be responded to. The only other people I know that think that slamming shut a conversation is equivalent to winning it are teens-and-unders. Silly "true masters", those tricks are for kids.


7/17/2011 8:27:39 PM

It has been brought to my attention, several times, since I updated my profile that not every man and woman on CM understands why I declared that I'm not a unicorn.


So, just to clear things up, that was a really polite way of letting the poly people know that I'm not interested in being part of a three-or-more-sum.


Hopefully we're all on the same page now.  :)

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